Looking Forward to It

A Facebook friend, who travels extensively for work, posted today that she is looking forward to Thanksgiving, a vacation, decorating for Christmas and spending time with her dogs. She admonished her friends to look forward as well, for she was looking forward -  looking for good in the world. Her words inspired me to write today’s entry because I realized that many of us, when looking back, get stuck in the past.  

Memories are beautiful things to keep close to us, and there's nothing wrong with reminiscing about the past. But living in it, being mired in thinking about "what used to be," can be dangerous. Trying to capture what once was is like trying to hear the color blue or singing about architecture...it's a waste of energy that could be applied to something much more worth while. We all know those people who are stuck in the past: the neighborhood mom who was once a popular cheerleader, who now throws "spirit parties" for the kids on the block, or the middle-aged insurance salesman who cannot stop talking about that touchdown run he made in high school that took his team to the state championships. 

I can totally understand the desire to stay in the past: simple, familiar, pleasant - those attributes are incredibly tempting when otherwise faced with taxes, strangers and stress. I used to work at a private school. It's been over 10 years since my position was eliminated there, but I still talk about my time there, like I just left last week. I miss all the friends I made there and I miss all the opportunities that job afforded me, but I must remind myself that they have moved on...and so must I.  Too much thinking about that time, makes me sad and removes me from living in the present moment. Living in the past, for some people, can be very depressing.  If you're having marriage problems, it's easy to recall the excitement of a former flame and remember that time fondly. Say you've gained a little weight since the kids were born; it's much more pleasant to remember when you were smoking hot and dancing in clubs surrounded by guys than to deal with adding exercise to an already packed schedule. But beware. The past is a nice place to visit, but you wouldn't want to live there!

Admittedly, for the past 6 months, I didn't believe I had anything to look forward to. I hated my job, knew I deserved better, and felt stymied at every turn I took in an effort to better myself and my life with The Pie. Much of my vision was clouded by what my life used to be, and discovering that it would never be that way again. The reason why? People die, children are born and they grow up. Things change.

Why stagnate in the past, when you can look FORWARD?  By definition, "looking forward to" is the eager anticipation of an event or time. It means that you are excited about something in the future. So why not start today by looking forward?  

Take a quick inventory of your life: family, job, friends, etc. Be grateful you have those things - I bet you didn't have them in the past, right? Make plans to do something you've never done before: volunteer, plan a ski trip, visit the gym. Give yourself something to look forward to! The Pie teases me because I like to be next in just about any situation - in line at the grocery store, at the doctor's office, bank, public restroom. I like to be next. It's the anticipation of it being my turn that gets me riled up. It's my something to look forward to.

From a physical perspective, looking back takes a toll on the body, as well. Turning your head to look over your shoulder strains muscles and places undue pressure on your neck. Maybe that's why life is a pain in the neck!  (sad attempt at a pun) Keep your head straight and eyes focused on what lies ahead of you - it's easier.

I know life is rough. Believe me, I KNOW life is rough. If someone tries to tell you otherwise, walk away - because they are lying. Make the best of what you have today, then you can look forward to what you will have tomorrow.  There's a saying that goes "Yesterday is past and tomorrow is future. Treat today like a gift, that's why it's called the present" (or something to that effect). But here's what I believe: 

 think when you look down,

pray when you look up and

hope when you look ahead.