One of the most difficult truths of life that I have recognized is this: Everything has a shelf life. Once a moment occurs, it’s too late to capture it. That’s why God gave us the ability to remember…to recall a special instant in time that made us smile, laugh or even shed a tear.
This past week has been a busy one…my father was admitted to the hospital, I faced my own health crisis and it was Spring Break, so the Pie was wound up tighter than an eight-day clock! But one thing I carry with me are the memories of times I know I can never get back, but that I will treasure for eternity. At least until the Alzheimer’s kicks in.
1. After the miserable rain-soaked days we finally were able to enjoy some time on the back patio. Dad is supposed to get some small bursts of exercise, so I encourage him to walk around the back yard. During a rest, the Pie plopped down in the grass at his feet and said, “I love you, Papa!” Then she began howling (she likes to play “puppy”). Suddenly my father joins in the howling and soon our actual dog joined the fray. I laughed at this ridiculous sight and then laughed harder when asked, “What’s so funny?” That moment is now stamped into my memory banks.
2. The night I put dad in the hospital, my anxiety level was off the charts! I needed a buffer between the Pie and me, so I called the fella I’ve been dating…friends call him The New Guy, so let’s go with that. I asked The New Guy if he could come to visit, then kept changing my mind about whether he should come or not. Finally, I relented and he came to the house, after the Pie was in bed, and we snuggled, talked and giggled. He surprised me with how supportive and sensitive he was to what was happening with me and I felt comfortable enough to fall asleep in his arms. Regardless of what the future holds with this man, I will carry that memory forever.
3. My family had an unexpected financial shortfall this month and we were sorely in need of groceries, prescriptions and other necessities. My lovely neighbor graciously volunteered to help. She brought us milk, bread, bottled water and even paid for medications for Dad. She is a sweet young Christian mother who is incredibly busy and probably financially strapped herself, but thought nothing of spending her family’s money to help us. The memory of her generosity is stuck in my heart.
4. This week we celebrated the 30th birthday of one of my favorite people in the world. Her mother and I are best friends and she has always been my “niece.” The young woman characterizes everything I wish the Pie to grow up to be – compassionate, generous, smart, kind, strong, logical, motivated and achieving. I was present when she was born 30 years ago and while I missed a large chunk of adolescence, I am honored to see the amazing woman she has grown into. The memory of her as a baby superimposed over the image of her managing her burgeoning family is one whose beauty is indescribable.
5. With the exception of actually bathing my dad, I provide all of his hygiene needs: clip and file, nails, rub lotions and potions on, check moles, cut hair, etc. It was hair-cutting day this week, and my little helper was ready to make a splash in the art of geezer barbery! The Pie assumed her place behind Papa’s chair and combed all of his little stray hairs into a semblance of a style, patted his head and pronounced, “Voila! (Although it sounded more like “Waaaa-Laaaaa”) I am finished. You left me no choice and I will sit down!” I have no idea what she meant, but I laughed myself silly and even giggled later at the memory of it.
It can be a moment, an instant, or a long process, but everything everywhere has potential to make a lasting, wonderful memory. The question is whether you make yourself open to experiencing it and noticing that something wonderful is happening before your very eyes. Open yours this week and be surprised at what you see!
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